By Dr Desiree C. T. Cox*
Francis Deloris Campbell
Jan. 20, 2005
I'm still here. Don't believe I still in Nassau, but I'm still here.
Mama call me, today asking when I coming back to West End. I don't know what she expect. I don't know how many times I have to tell her I don't know. I miss Warren, but not enough to come back to West End. I know that sound bad, but it's true.
Lord, I thank you for the hurricane. 'Cause this diary is a blessing. Some things you can't tell people. But this my book. In here I could say whatever I want to say and write whatever I want to write in here. So God I thank you for the hurricane, 'cause if wasn't for the hurricane I wouldn't a start up no diary, so thank God for the hurricane.
I see now send hurricane Frances for me, to set me free.
So. Yes. I'm still here in Nassau. For now.
Jan. 24, 2005
God I thank you. Because I know it's you who intervene in the form of call on my cell phone. You send the call through, because father you know if I did stand next to that white woman for one more minute, she would not have gone home with the same face her mama born her with. I tell you Lord, it you hadn't have detained my slapping-hand with that cellphone, well, they would a had to call the police, that's all I could say. Because, if it's one thing I can't stand it's people what don't even belong here pitching up in my face and lecturing me about my country.
Anyhow, let me don't dwell on this negativity, before my pressure go up sky-high, and I bust one blood vessel in my head and Sandra have to call the ambulance for me. I know the client is king. But Jesus Lord. That's why me I couldn't be no businessman. If it was me I wouldn't even serve people like that. People come up round me acting like that I'd run them, tell them go grow they own vegetables. No Lord, let me don't dwell on this. In this world you always going find difficult people who come right when you about to close down the place and then want act like they know everything and they own everything.
No, don't let me linger on this no more. Let me just go to my bed and sleep so I could get to the farm early tomorrow so I could finish dealing with them tomato's. Man, I tell you when I finish with them they going be so big and so juicy.
No, let me don't linger on foolishness tonight.
Jan. 24, 2005
Thank you Lord for this fresh new day. And thank you for this blessed country you have made for me to live in. And again, I thank you for holding my tongue and distracting my hand yesterday and saving me from waking up in the jail-house this morning on account of striking that stupid arrogant woman on the farm yesterday, because now, now I can see it wasn't her who was in the fool. I am the fool. A fool in my own country. I don't know whether they have flamingo's in Andros or not. I don't know if we even have any ducks in The Bahamas, let alone, Bahamian ducks, for all I know she could be right, because I don't know. But I know one thing, Lord I know you set me free for a purpose. I can't see all of what you have me to do but, one thing I know, this restlessness in me, I know that's you speaking to me. And I vow, from this day on, I Francis Deloris, am going to know everything there is to know everything there is to know about this country so that no-body, be they white, black, green, purple or peach, will be able to tell what is, and is not mine, and what does and does not belong here. Of course, I know it's not really mine, it's yours Lord, but you know what I mean.
So now, let me go down there to the farm and see what you have to teach me today.
Francis
*This series of 'People Transform' features the Hurricane Diary based on the true stories and exciting adventures of a Bahamian woman finding the courage to follow her inner voice, be authentic and transform her life after a devastating hurricane.
© Dr Desirée C. T. Cox
Described by a career profile in the British Medical Journal as a 'Renaissance Woman', Desirée C. T. Cox is a physician, musician, historian, and writer. She is the Rhodes Scholar from the Bahamas and has been educated at Queens College (primary and secondary school), McGill University (Montreal, Canada), the University of Oxford (England) and the University of Cambridge (England). She now lives and works in Nassau, Bahamas as a consultant to the Urban Renewal Commission. The author welcomes comments about the stories. For comments Email: dctcox@hotmail.com
