Women urged not to
Guardian Lifestyles Editor
Published: Jul 04, 2013
Despite what they may have gone through in life, the women of Living Waters Kingdom Ministries were reminded that they are all chosen by God and that they are all Glamorous Girls Giving God Glory (G5) by the church’s first lady, Olivia Wells, during her recent G5 Conference.
Wells told them that when she came to the place where she understood that she was chosen by God her life changed entirely. And she said when people come to that realization they are not afraid to step out and take chances.
“The Lord wants you to know that you are chosen and not to settle for anything in life,” Wells told a packed church. “Allow the word of God to take hold of your spirit and pull you into the place God wants you to be. When you come to the place where you allow God to reign in your life, you will become the complete sister, the woman that is set aside that is satisfied, nothing missing, nothing lacking, you are complete. You may not be driving the car that you want, but you are satisfied.”
The wife of Pastor Raymond Wells told the women that as God’s girls they are to trust him, even when they can’t see him in their situations. She reminded them that she was not afraid or ashamed to acknowledge that she belongs to Christ and urged them to lift up the name of Jesus and to be Glamorous Girls Giving God Glory.
Wells told the congregation about her journey to becoming the glamorous girl she is who gives God glory.
While preparing for the conference, Wells said she thought back on some of the things she had gone through in her life, as it was not just her intention to host a women’s conference but to empower women to understand who they are and to assist them in appreciating their personal value and recognizing what the Lord had placed within them. She said she hoped to strengthen the women to live the kind of life that glorifies God.
Reflecting on her childhood, she told a tale of a child who thought everything was wrong with her – she wasn’t too pretty, had ‘picky hair’, a big nose and was afraid to talk to people. And as far as her memory serves her, she said her siblings weren’t nice to her either. Wells said she had it so bad that she would often find herself in a corner crying and sometimes crying for nothing. She recalled being a homebody kind of person who was always under her mother, while her siblings were “thugs” who did their own thing.
“I was born different,” said Wells, who now knows her strength and lives the kind of life she knows glorifies God. She told the women to avoid being women who gossip, are enslaved, fearful, harsh, empty and full of garbage.
She said women with those personality traits at some point in life experienced rejection.
“It’s this desperate desire to be loved, to be needed, to be wanted that has driven us to go looking for love in all the wrong places,” said Wells.
She said the spirit of rejection is so powerful that even the strongest woman will succumb to its control and women who come across as the roughest and the toughest are usually the weakest.
“All your life, you may have been considered insignificant, but with God’s help, and if you would allow God, he wants to bring you to the place where you understand who you are and to help you discover you,” said Wells.
She told the congregation that whichever woman represents them that if they allow him, God would change their name from gossip girl, harsh, bondage or slave, empty, fearful and garbage, if they would allow him.
“He wants to bring us to the place where we truly understand who He is and where we truly understand who we are in Him. When you allow God to come in he brings you from all of this. And we all at some point in our lives were branded one of these ladies,” she said.
Wells encouraged the women – especially the single mothers – to not use their situations as excuses not to do what is right for their children.
“A dad out of place is not an excuse for you not to grow your children up in the principles of God,” she told the women.
“It’s not an excuse not for you to love and care for them the way that you are expected to. Do not take it out on those children.”
Recounting a story from her childhood, Wells, the fourth of six girls by her mother, told a story she’s heard countless times about her mother going into labor while pregnant with her. She said her dad, who was in the house at the time, told his wife that he was going around the corner to call the ambulance.
Wells said he left the house that day and never returned home, and on top of that the ambulance never came for her mother. Wells said her mother had to take her three siblings, ages five, two and one at the time, and trudge from their home in Montell Heights to a cousin’s home, which was known as the house of Jehovah’s Prayer Band across Robinson Road, to seek help. They called the ambulance, but it was too late, Wells had already been born.
“By the time they showed up I had already been delivered by the mothers of Zion, by prayer warriors. God had a plan,” said Wells.
Acknowledging that she’s not the only woman with an interesting background, and that many women were raised in homes that were classified as ‘broken’ because a male figure was not present. She told them that because a male figure is not heading a home does not mean that something is wrong.
Wells reminded the women that there are many children who have done exceptionally well who were raised by single mothers who did not let an absentee father be an excuse not to push as hard as they needed to. She said her mother was one of them.
And she told them to discount what they may have heard about being called outcasts because they were raised in homes and communities society referred to as unfit. And to not dwell on the fact that people may judge by the community they were born in.
“Someone’s opinion of you does not have to become your reality. That is something you need to grab in your spirit and keep with you. Where you were born is not your final destination. Your place of birth does not dictate your future. I’m a witness of this having been born and raised in the ghetto – Montell Heights. Your place of birth has nothing to do with your future,” she told them.
Raise your self-esteem
Wells told her audience that having low self-esteem can cause a person to be dysfunctional, and that a lack of identity will cause them to spend a whole lot of time trying to look like, act and sound like someone else.
“For so long, I have been held captive by this spirit of low self-esteem, [but] I believe that this is why God has given me this assignment to help women discover their identity and fulfill their purpose on earth,” she said.
She reminded them that many people dedicate themselves to Christ, but many times they take it back and don’t allow God’s word to control their lives.
“It’s not until I really allowed the word of God to rule my life and I began to understand who I am in God that I came to that place where I wasn’t going to be crying for nothing anymore, and I’m not going to be crying for everything anymore,” Wells said.
“I have learned to stand in who I am. When you come to the place where you know who you are, and you get your identity together, not everyone can make you cry. As a matter of fact, not every word touches you.
“You hear it, but it doesn’t take root in your spirit. I was one who held onto and pondered everything... that’s why so many of us are depressed because we don’t know how to just let things go by and let words roll off our back.
“We begin to allow what people say about us to have its root in our lives and dictate the way we should be going as women, so at any given point in time we can be anybody that somebody else wants us to be – been there, done that.”
She also encouraged the women of the church to not listen to the many nonsensical rules that are keeping them out of the church — unwritten rules that say
Christian women should not wear loud colors like red lipstick and nail polish.
“Early in ministry, I always liked the nice colored polish, way back then I was Deacon Ray’s wife, and couldn’t wear the red lipstick and red polish or orange lipstick and orange polish because Christian women don’t wear that. But I’m delivered. You cannot tell me that anymore.” Besides she told the audience that her husband loves red lipstick on her.
Wells said many of the “nonsensical rules” have nothing to do with a person’s salvation and nothing to do with how the Lord is calling someone to live, but that she understands modesty and was in agreement that women should not be in the house of God naked. She told the women to be careful what they wear and how they act when in God’s house, and said some of the things that people wear while in church make no sense.
Because of her low self-esteem, Wells said she believes the Lord gave her the assignment to host the G5 Conference – to help women get to the place where they understand who they are and can recognize the gift that the Lord has placed within them and appreciate their personal value.
“It is only when you begin to understand your personal value that you stop trying to be somebody else,” she told them. “You’re not supposed to be an imitator. You are an original.”
She asked the women to think about what it is that hindered them from discovering themselves. She asked them to think about what was stopping them from being all God destined them to be on earth. She asked them to think about what was keeping them from discovering their true potential. And what was it that had them walking with their head hung low?
Olivia Wells’ take on personalities of women living a stagnated life
Miss Caution: She’s careful. Much care is taken to avoid mistakes or what can be mistakes. Many of us are in this position right now where we are very careful and cautious about who we allow in our space and about who we allow to speak into us. While this is good, most of the time all these guards are up because you have been hurt so many times until it is difficult for you to trust anyone. You are afraid to drop your guard because you’ve been hurt. You go through life thinking everyone is out to get you. You battle inwardly thinking everyone hates you, and those who try to befriend you is simply trying to use you. In many cases though, your careful is really fearful. Somehow Miss Cautious has activated fear instead of faith. Because you are cautious, you are afraid to take risks, afraid to invest, afraid to make certain decisions. You don’t trust anybody.
Miss Garbage Bag: She’s a waste collector. She see herself as useless, worthless and unwanted and only that which is refused by others you truly believe is yours. You believe that the only thing in life for you is that which is rejected. You struggle with identity and desperately want everyone to love and approve of you. You live without a standard and allow any and everybody to drop any and everything not only on you, but in you because you don’t understand who you are and that you are worth much. Somehow you have accepted the lie that you will never make it without the others who live to belittle you. So you are entirely dependent on them even though they are treating you like dirt. You have to raise your standards and understand who you are.
Miss Chains: She’s in bondage, a state of being a slave. She’s in bondage to a strong hold such as generational curses and we struggle with them. What type of life did your parents live, are you still living it? How many of your family members got divorced? Who is controlling your life by actions of old?
Miss Newspaper Girl: She’s very beautiful, very fashionable, but nothing but a gossip girl. She lives a life of gossip and division and is caught up in the constant confusion and causing discord in the workplace, church, community and her home. She’s the one saying everybody is lying on her, but why is it that her name is always mixed up in the confusion. When she opens her mouth, she’s destroying someone’s life by destroying that person’s character, their name, their families. Troublemakers need to get a grip on it.
Miss Bubble Wrap and Balloon Girl: She has such class, she’s beautiful, but she’s empty. She has a lot going on for her outwardly, but there’s nothing on the inside – no substance. She’s the one that’s tripping out easily and cannot hold herself together because there’s nothing inside of her. She’s the one with the beauty, not the brain. She chooses to lay and play, and that’s her survival game. Sometimes she may want to stand against the things that are destroying her, but she never took time to really spend with herself and is running from one relationship to another and has always been treated the same way. She is desperately seeking love and falls for the same mess over and over again. But she gives a wow. She’s beautiful, but if she opens her mouth, you get hot air. We don’t want to be this lady. Have substance within.
Miss Sandpaper Girl: This is a woman of high class – money, Gucci, fashionable, bling belt, she has it going on or appears to, but if you walk close enough, she will grab you. She is rough and abrasive and shows little concern for the feelings of others. She doesn’t care about anybody. Do you know what she may have had to do to get this outfit? How many other women and children may have starved, children got put out of private school because she refused to let the man take care of his family. Do you know how many people may have lost their promotion because she lay and play to get the job. She’s rough and abrasive. She’s the woman who walks around defensively and is always ready to attack. She’s hot-tempered, heady and glamorous, but always ready to protest, demand, make loud noises and get on everybody’s nerves. Nobody wants to be around her. Most of the time her behavior is out of ignorance. She doesn’t know why she’s fighting. Somebody hurt her once, now everybody is a threat, and it’s difficult to make friends because she’s always on the battlefield, so nobody can befriend her because nobody wants to be around her and fighting all the time. It’s also difficult for her family to love her, and she finds pleasure in chopping down anyone who challenges her. But remember, when sandpaper is worn down, it’s good for nothing but to be thrown in the dump.